Get help to get liked

Pleasures of giving

Pleasures of giving

My conservative upbringing made me a very hesitant being while seeking help. I always ruled out all the possible alternatives before having to ask someone something. But when it comes to helping others, I never waited to be asked. I would do what I could within my limited resources.

Recently I came across Ben Franklin effect which left me ponder over my behavior so far. We often believe that we help those we like and / or those of whom we assume will reciprocate. But, this phenomena says once you help someone you justify your own action (is this what is called pleasure of giving?) and start liking the receiver of the help. It even goes a little further and says, once you help someone, the probability of helping them again goes up further. John Jekher and David Landy’s research re-emphasizes the same.

Maa musings here
– Is this the real reason for the infinite and selfless mothers’ love?
– Is this why we see some philanthropists get addicted to philanthropy?
– Shouldn’t I actually be going around seeking help instead of trying to help?
– What do I teach my son, to help or to extract help?

Atleast one thing is clear, next time I need help I should seek it with no two thoughts!

May you be on both sides!

May you be on both sides!

My inspiration


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